Roleplay under construction, (merged with the Ninty topic) Options

[Team Black]

hey uh, where did the roleplay go?

Just like roleplay MKI, there's become a lot of chaos and disorientation in the roleplay.
It was bound to happen, I just want to put it back on track before it gets too far.
I've set it under 'hidden', since I can't edit posts while the topic is closed. So it's really still there, even though you can't see it (Corsair, you can still see it right?)

I'm doing some hardcore editing on it, on spelling & grammar, removing the ion storm, making the characters a little more believable & less overpowered, and rewording some sections to make more sense to the reader.
TBA some entries were so grammatically bad that I didn't even take the time to read them at first. That's a big NO for us as writers: what's the point of spending the time writing, if all our readers are scared away by run ons and, bad speling, and, too many comas, and cant none even, now wat the frik the stories abut.

I know not everyone has English as a first language, but the rule holds true if you know you're going to bomb the story, please don't write.
Reading it can be just as entertaining

I know a lot of people are putting a lot of time and effort into this RP - if no one reads our roleplay because it's filled with bad writing and a boring story, then all that work has gone to waste. I'm doing what I can to edit out the garbage, so that none of the good work goes to waste

[Team Black]

OK folks, Roleplay MK 2.5 is up & open again. Keep in mind what I've said before:

Since I have such little time to edit the roleplay, I'm going to be a whole lot more strict on the direction it should go. I'll give what feedback I can, and listen to opinions, but if all we're doing is bashing heads, your character will die. (though I'll probably let you introduce a new character)
Not everyone will be able to incorporate whatever random ideas come in their minds. Please make your own roleplay and do it there.
Just keep your character acting believable. don't be so caught up in getting your plot going that you have to make your character have to act totally stupid, or unreal.
(i.E. someone wandering aimlessly in a dark alleyway,
or some random joe making random guesses on what the bad guys are doing, and then starts ordering people around.).

remember, we're playing as real people in an abnormal world.

What I did is I deleted page 5 and 6, right before Zen finds the bomb in the armory. I saved the html's, which you can download below for reference.
I'll encourage you guys to write new sections entirely, but for the parts you feel are well written, go ahead an put those in as they fit (as long as it's not a big stretch)

Here's the list of things that will change. These are non-negotiable. I will NOT argue over it, I just want to get this roleplay up and going again, and moving as smoothly as possible. I don't intend to offend people, I just want to keep everything working smooth. If you feel you need to overreact, or if you cant take the criticism properly, your character will die.

-no ion storm
-Lose the part with Zen and the bomb entirely. It slowed down a lot of the action.
- Kriassin will be the secure, experienced commander that we expect him to be. I already gave the spiel on him, and I trust you won't let me down Vintz
-Krissy will be a female titan pilot, as we've talked about before. She'll be as emotionally stable as any average soldier (if not, more secure). She's not a clone and has no special DNA. She is classified to pilot any vehicle in the GDI arsenal, so you can be a little flexible with that (just like Black is a generic pilot - So far he's piloted a carryall, an orca, and a bomber...). If you have time, I'd appreciate if you could edit your RP posts and take out stuff that implies she's a cat..
- Nod Strike, make sure you're keeping some sort of reference as to where you crew is, and what they're doing there. Your writing is pretty good, but a lot of times we get confused on how you're involved in the story :0
- Make sure Glazt doesn't auto-hit. She doesn't spot Ward as he approaches her position. Also, she was shot, by Ward and pumped with sedatives, and likely disarmed when Ward took her captive. Ward wouldn't make dumb mistakes like "tying the bands improperly", or
leaving her a combat knife or a pistol, regardless of where it was.. Let alone, failing to see her reach for it.
I'd just say, have an artillery shell send them both flying, then slide down a hill into the river and crash through the ice. Etc.
- Black is in the communications center directing air traffic. I'll see if I can be more involved, but college comes first. At this po
- McNeil MUST be involved more. IE when Kriassin lands, he would report to Black or McNeil, and get his assignments from them.
we need to have less "aimless wandering" and actual purpose and order..
-also remember, half of Hammerfest is shared by mutants. Make sure you get them involved when they should be (If Nod is attacking, don't just have GDI fight while the shiners sit on their bums.
- Corsair, keep doing what you're doing.

Basically, just play a character the way the would if it were an actual human in that situation. No uber powers or nothin, straight up gritty war.

This post has been edited by Team Black: Oct 14 2007, 03:05 AM

Attached File(s)

 RPMK2_pages_4_6.zip ( 176.96K ) Number of downloads: 435