Roleplay under construction, (merged with the Ninty topic) Options

[Team Black]

hey uh, where did the roleplay go?

Just like roleplay MKI, there's become a lot of chaos and disorientation in the roleplay.
It was bound to happen, I just want to put it back on track before it gets too far.
I've set it under 'hidden', since I can't edit posts while the topic is closed. So it's really still there, even though you can't see it (Corsair, you can still see it right?)

I'm doing some hardcore editing on it, on spelling & grammar, removing the ion storm, making the characters a little more believable & less overpowered, and rewording some sections to make more sense to the reader.
TBA some entries were so grammatically bad that I didn't even take the time to read them at first. That's a big NO for us as writers: what's the point of spending the time writing, if all our readers are scared away by run ons and, bad speling, and, too many comas, and cant none even, now wat the frik the stories abut.

I know not everyone has English as a first language, but the rule holds true if you know you're going to bomb the story, please don't write.
Reading it can be just as entertaining

I know a lot of people are putting a lot of time and effort into this RP - if no one reads our roleplay because it's filled with bad writing and a boring story, then all that work has gone to waste. I'm doing what I can to edit out the garbage, so that none of the good work goes to waste

[Team Black]

Ninty, I appreciate your imagination, but you need to bring it back down to earth.
Just seeing a plane fly by and hearing the name "Kriassin", makes her run off in some random direction, all of the sudden remembering things.
Then, magcially finding the papaers that Ward dropped, and then finding out OMG itz the evil doctor!!1
not only that, but your spelling and grammar is simply intolerable.

For the sake of the story, I'm editing pretty much all of that. Random flashbacks, people thinking out the plot to themselves, and improbable ways of having characters find answers are really really bad ways to write a story.

You don't even need all this complex drama and stuff - that really only confuses it. Just look at Corsair, he's using just a grunt infantry we know almost nothing about, and he's got the most interesting story of all of us IMO..

I understand story writing isn't everyone's strength, but I don't want this continue and take away from the well written work of those who do.
At this point, it's up to you if you want to back out - it's no shame, and it's just as entertaining to to read the story as it is to write it
If you still can't seem to get it though, you're going to have to stop on my call. I can't keep editing all your errors, and it's really lagging the quality of our story.
If you still feel the urge to write, by all means make your own story, and put whatever you want in it - but I want to keep this a nicely written and interesting roleplay.

This post has been edited by Team Black: Sep 30 2007, 10:24 PM

[Corsair]

Just look at Corsair, he's using just a grunt infantry we know almost nothing about

Hm, maybe I should mention some of their history (if no one has already seen it)

This is Ward's bio. from the beginning and it covers some of his life before he came to Hammerfest:

Name: Sergeant Chris Ward
FACTION: GDI
JOB: Squad Leader - Light Infantry
LOCATION: Snow covered bunker nearby Hammerfest
BIO: He joined a milita that was formed by a confederation of local towns and villages, it was formed to route out the "invading" shiners. He soon found that the shiners were not bloodthirsty beasts. He wanted to help the shiners and his family and friends by joining a far larger organization, and something with a much larger money base than a bunch of rag-tag border towns. He had originally sought to join Nod, to whom he tells no one in a normal conversation; however, the GDI was a far easier organization to find. He ranked up to Sergeant before being reassigned to Hammerfest, and unfortunately he hasn't been able to do much of anything to help his towns since he left several months ago.

Heres something for Sergeant McGaven, I found it on Page One of the RP:

Corporal McGaven was being the walker that he is, he didn't like sitting for too long. He had only taken one turn to rest on the hover vehicles. He was really deep in thought, not even thinking about everyone around him. Not much anyway. He was thinking about home, Ireland. A family eating a nice hot dinner, praying for their son who was at war. Unfortunately, it wasn't his family. His father was more than likely never at the house. He had several brothers, but most died in a plane crash from a trip to Spain long ago. His mother and girlfriend with them. His only remaining family member was his last brother, Cathal McGaven. Even that is nothing to celebrate, he disappeared a couple months ago. He only knew by the letter he got from his father back home. His father found a letter by Cathal saying that he was leaving home to find himself. Whatever he meant by it he had more than likely only found his maker.

Ward can't wait to get back to his life while McGaven wants to stay as far away as he can from home

This post has been edited by Corsair: Oct 1 2007, 12:36 AM